Reviewed by Robert Bogenberger, PhD. To swipe left or to swipe right? That is the question. The apps come with their fair share of problems. Women who want to date men, for instance, often have to deal with an ocean of connection requests and online harassment. Although the apps have made it simpler to share your sexual identity and date within your gender identity preferences, many gay men in particular have called the experience superficial.
No matter how you slice it, dating can be hard. But these scenarios only scratch the surface of what can go wrong when you look for love on the apps. The challenges of dating apps Dating apps tend to amplify problems that exist in traditional dating, such as: Initial attraction tends to be surface-level. People judge potential matches by their photos, often within seconds.
The choices can be overwhelming. How do you decide who to connect with? How do you avoid wasting time chatting with too many different people? The process is exhausting. Even when you think things are going well, the other person could decide to break it off when you least expect it—or, even worse, never respond again.
How dating apps affect your mental health When it comes to dating, both through apps and in person, our gut feelings usually rule the day. We can try to be logical and practical about it, but in the end, our desires and emotions tend to drive our thoughts and behaviors.
If all you want is to find someone you really like and have them like you back, it can be difficult to manage your self-focused thoughts and emotions. Do any of these common experiences sound familiar to you? You may not be able to avoid negative experiences, but you can prepare yourself to manage them in a safe and healthy way. Develop a healthy sense of self-esteem. Set limits on how much time you spend swiping and messaging. Instead of trying to keep up conversations with as many matches as possible, draw the line at a specific limit: Say three or four at a time.
