This is the story of a search for identity through the lens of religion. I was born and bred in Fez, Morocco, within a predominantly Muslim family. And yet, what I really like is Judaism. However sensitive and deeply personal this topic might be, I have decided to venture out and put into words my journey, because this human, intellectual and spiritual adventure lies at the cornerstone of my identity.
Without a working network connection, I was cut off from modern civilization and spent the better part of my free time reading the essays of Claude Riveline, himself a graduate of France's Polytechnique who spent his career teaching civil servants organizational management at the Ecole des Mines , the French School of Mines. My hero Riveline has a distinct gift for writing, coupled with a sense of humor and wisdom that seduced me in its vision of Judaism; only today do I fully realize the immense influence his magnificent texts had upon me.
My relationship to Judaism evolved according to a somewhat dialectic cycle: ignorance, admiration, and understanding. Ignorance for the first 18 years of my life, spent in Morocco within an almost exclusively Muslim environment, religiously impoverished by an education rooted in dogmatism. While there can be no doubt that my mother's origins are Jewish, she would almost never speak about it -- I think she herself never understood this very well.
Ironically, this isolation nurtured in me a spontaneous appreciation for Judaism, as I swam against the tide of Anti-Zionist animosity around me, which was sometimes discreet, barely perceptible, crouching beneath a popular street expression or a television comment about the conflict in the Middle East, and other times blatant, outrageous, revolting, shouted out by the crowds who would demonstrate and burn the "flag of shame" as they called for the destruction of the country I love.
Admittedly, the official state position has always been to proudly recognize the millennial contributions of the Moroccan Jewish community and, historically, political leaders have manifestly acted towards a peaceful coexistence and a common effort to achieve national progress, which would be inconceivable without the Jews.
